Asian black dating girl man

During and after college, I have maintained a diverse group of friends and have had the good fortune to travel to various places in Asia including a two year stint in Korea and Taiwan, as well as less extensive periods in Hong Kong, Japan, and mainland China.Moreover, I have dated both intra- and inter-racially (with Black women among others) and was most recently in a 3 year relationship with a Black American woman (who self-identified as such).

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Before I get to the heart of my response, perhaps I should preface it with a little information about myself.

I am a 32 year old Korean American man who was adopted from South Korea when I was nine months old.

Either scenario could result in having to deal with the pressure to assimilate into mainstream American society (which is always synonymous with White in the US) or adhere to the cultural traditions of one’s sending country.

(Thus, I am skeptical that this problem would not be potentially encountered by Black American women dating Greek, Italian, or even Nigerian men whose parents were urging them to do one or both of the above.)Finally, there is the concern that Asian men may only be interested in Asian women/may not be attracted to Black women.

Before getting into this, I will first state that I am in no way concerned with the Black women or Asian men who genuinely do not find each other sexually attractive for whatever reason.

In other words, I’m not trying to take on the job of convincing Black women to give Asian men a chance who would not want to already (or vice versa). (At the same time I do always find it peculiar when I hear people say that they “just don’t find ‘group x’ attractive.” Can’t help but think it is more complex than that but hey…that’s just me.) I think that the reason for this potential concern stems mainly from the ways in ways in which I feel we are largely represented within American media and (pop) culture.

While it may seem as though White and Black Americans are positioned on antithetical ends of an idyllic racial spectrum, I would argue that in actuality it is Asians who are presented as the polar opposites of their Black counterparts (in many respects with Asians as hypo and Black Americans as hyper ).

For instance, as a whole Asians are seen as small, quiet, and unassertive (which in a Western context are coded as feminine), whereas Black people are presented as big, loud, and physically dominant/imposing (which in turn are coded as masculine).

Chances are if an Asian man is fourth, third, or even second generation, this issue may not prove prohibitive in the least.

This, much like the previous example, is not then specific to Asian men but rather an issue which could stem from being an immigrant from another country/having parents who are immigrants.

While my lack of Asian family ties/parentage may make me seem like a less-than-ideal candidate to respond to your initial question, I think that it is for that very reason that my insight may prove to be of value.

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